A new attitude can change everything. It really can…One of the topics thats been lingering on my mind is validation, particularly social media validation. I have a huge effect on my baby sister and that makes me think about the way I would like her to grow up seeing herself.

We live in a world where ‘likes’ and ‘followers’ are a big deal! And that’s okay until you realise it has a deep rooted effect on the way a lot of people including myself see themselves. Of course my outlook on this has changed because I used to feel unworthy if I didn’t get a huge following or have as many likes as the next person. Maybe I was too busy caring about what everybody thought that I became so vain in my unsurity. See, back then, it was easier to be confident in myself because I was in a world of safe censored opinions. Now with Social Media we are unknowingly bombarded with the opinions of millions of other people in the world and this easily influences how we see ourselves.
The images, the heated opinions, the videos and the trolling have changed how we see ourselves even though 90% of the times we feel remotely connected to the issues. Subconsciously I feel we become connected to them and try harder to achieve internet ‘worthiness’.
You don’t have to conform to the world’s idea of beautiful to be beautiful! I’m okay now with posting images of myself that I feel look crusty but have such an amazing memory attached to them because I hope I’m teaching her that that’s what matters. You don’t always have to be on ‘fleek’ to feel beautiful, that isn’t very realistic. Sometimes the memory behind the photos, videos, posts must be so meaningful that online validation cannot take away that weight. That beauty.

 

EAK

estherkatonga

6 Comments

  1. Oluchee

    14/01/2016

    True. But i think its deeper than how it seems like. The whole seeking online validation and all. It’s about self esteem more of. Not everyone has a natural good self esteem, you have to build one.

    I think with that, people’s opinion would have little dents in the skin. Because then, there’ll be confidence. And confidence can help a lot in character building

    I mean.. what if someone thinks your eyebrows are skewed? You know you’re cuter than some other people!!

    • estherkatonga

      14/01/2016

      😁. It’s definitely a self-esteem issue and one of my biggest challenges was not realising that in the first place. Ive grown up relatively confident so I never believed I would ever have self confidence issues in my 20s. So when they did happen, I brushed them off as something lighter.
      Now I realise character building never ends!

      • Oluchee

        20/01/2016

        My dear… true. I’m still having troubles there. My self-esteem is placed on stuffs like appearance and all.. not good. Like I’ll feel less confident if i dont feel I look good, or random stuffs like that. So I understand those that need appraisal from outside. I’ve always tried to wonder if it had to do with what you feed your mind with, or where you grew up, or how one was treated socially.

      • estherkatonga

        22/01/2016

        I know my mind was on a junk overload! And I knew it, but I felt it was too much work to try to be positive. Now I’m willing to do the work. I have to, otherwise il lose my mind…

      • Oluchee

        22/01/2016

        That’s the spirit. The way you said you’re willing to do the work.. sounded real bold and daring. Cool

      • estherkatonga

        22/01/2016

        Thanks!😊

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